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So, I did initially write a mini essay on short films as a media, but, a global pandemic struck, and with the spare time I had on my hands as I was out of work , I got to work making this piece a feature length film. I was worried it would come across as me trying to make it feature length for the sake of it, but the expansion is the original story fleshed out and fully realised, plus a lot of ideas I had and scrapped or wanted to explore in another film.

I took a break from writing it for a while, but I returned to it around the end of summer 2020, and as of now with a first draft feature I'm happy with, it stands at 85 pages. 

my project job roles

director             writer          cinematographer          editor           camera operator

A director's job is to oversee all of the creative process, and hopefully inject it with style and personality. I am well experienced in directing, as I've directed five short films now on my YouTube channel. I feel like the only thing I need to hone in on is directing my actors. This time however I have a very good script to elevate them further.

A writer's job is to write the script. I've gone through about 3 or 4 drafts of the script and its been a journey but since draft 1, everyone I've shown has spoken very highly of it. As this is very character driven, I was quite scared of showing off the script, as people say my weakest skill as a film maker is my character creations, but people have been telling me I've done an excellent job of writing up these very distinct characters. I'm extremely hopeful of this script.

A cinematographer's role is to find interesting and unique ways of shooting a scene. Even though I won't always be manning the camera, I'd still label myself the cinematographer I reckon. I have a distinct idea for the visual style, and I rather enjoy looking for new shots and ideas when I get on set or when I'm scouting a location. I always find myself looking for interesting shot ideas when I'm just out and about.

The editor's role is to take all the audio and footage, chop it up into the respective scenes, and create a well paced, cohesive finished film. I'd say I'm a pretty quick and efficient editor. I use Premiere Pro, and I've edited all my short films so far.

My role as camera operator is only a maybe. It'll be rare I ever have to handle the camera on set, it'll only be in desperate times where I am unable to find a camera operator. Even s, I am well adversed in camera operating, there's a few times I've had to do it on my own films as I've been unable to get crew. 
We will be shooting on my Canon 100D, a reliable DSLR camera I've been using for all my films so far.



One show I watched was an FX series called Pose. This show was a very insightful look into the world of not only transgender people, but POC trans and gay people, and the formation of that community in 80s America.
This show gave a very insightful look into the attitudes towards this community that sadly still prevail to this day, luckily to a lesser extent in most areas now. 
It tells very unfortunate truths. How hard it is for trans women to find work so they get whatever they can find, even turning to prostitution. The way society treats them, a great example being the bar scene. The pain of being dead named and disrespected in that way.

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As part of my research I've decided to take a look at some Transgender media, mainly films and TV.

Transgender Media

[ insert that dead name clip ] 

I think this show is great. It's informative whilst staying entertaining, and is a great insight onto how it is to be transgender, especially in that day and age. As my film is set in the modern day though, I can't implement too many ideas this show has. However, there are a lot of personal scenes that hone in on personal struggles and things to do with every day life living as a trans woman. This will help inspire me write more scenes like this, as I feel it's not dealt with as primarily in my script as I wish it was (in it's first draft form), and create more scenes. I don't think in its current form there's enough of Charlie being treated as a boy by family, so maybe I could build on that a bit more. I should, as it's something I have to deal with on a daily basis, it's a big part of my life.

Trans YouTube

The short films on the YouTube platform that cover being Transgender, are pretty grim. From my findings, so many of them portray this horrible reality where everyone is horrible and hates the transgender character. The films commonly end with the main character being tossed away by friends and family, or the main character killing themselves. 
Imagine being a gender questioning child or teenager, going to search for information, trying to find themselves, and being faced with this. You see people being rejected from their friends, their family, and seeing the only way out is suicide. The film Posture conveys alack of understanding of being a trans woman. She buys a dress and instantly thinks "I'm transgender", transitioning is not as simple as that. She is quickly rejected by her family and girlfriend and is left cold on the streets. The film NIKITA simply presents us with a world where I kid you not, everyone, is transphobic. She is hated, and ends up killing herself. Unfortunately this is a reality for some people, but clearly she is not speaking from personal experience, as there's tones of extras in the classroom scenes that have agreed to be in the film, so clearly she's not completely surrounded by hate. So essentially she's spreading a bad message for the sake of it. It is fear mongering, and not helpful for trans youth.

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The films aren't made in bad taste, but too many of them convey what admittedly is unfortunately the case for a lot of trans youth. I feel like we need a good balance of films that cover this, but also a lot that give a positive outlook, and give some hope to trans youth. 

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this film gets bonus points for being an all trans cast and crew ! <3

This short film I find to be slightly more hopeful and realistic, although being in my eyes not very well made. The film is about a woman who falls out with her neighbour when the neighbour is told that she is trans. She ends up sticking up for her in the end, but the most realistic part is the end. It covers how people outside of the community can be respectful, but still have some sort of internalised Transphobia in them. I wish however that this was told in the actual film as I would have liked to see how they tackled the subject, but it is told in title cards. We get a hint of it in the last minute, where the lady scoffs a little at the idea of someone getting top surgery, but that's the end of the film.

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When compiling the soundtrack, I consciously had the whole soundtrack be  made up of songs sung by men, as it re enforces voice dysphoria, something most trans women deal with heavy. This is where a woman feels uncomfortable with her masculine voice. Having a soundtrack sung by men I feel will enhance this further. One thing that was suggested to me is having the last song be sung by a female and this is a sweet idea, I feel like it wouldn't make so much sense, as the film doesn't end with her finishing her transition, but her finding solace in herself. But then again, that's a reason I could implement the idea because of as well. I have had quite a few friends tell me I should do this. I really wanted to end off the film with the song Boys Don't Cry by The Cure, but I could find a female cover of that song. Or I could just re assign it to a scene earlier on in the film.
To create the soundtrack, I'm simply keeping a Spotify playlist, that I add songs to that fit the general vibe of the film. 
A must have song is Ivy by Frank Ocean. This was a very personal pick, because of the lyrics. "I thought that I was dreaming, when you said you loved me." I feel like most trans people could relate to this, as I did. The idea of coming out, and still being told you're loved is such a heart warming feeling. I think it's essential I open the film with this song. It's also just a lovely soft song that I think will very well accompany the opening visuals of early morning street cruising.

Unlike last year, with my final project using a bunch of music from an artist who is okay with public use of music, I'm wanting to use a lot of big name artists. In doing my research, I found this article which was very informative on song licensing rights. I found out that it costs around 500 dollars for the licensing of the average song. This means I'll have to whittle down the soundtrack significantly. This playlist mainly acted as mood music for writing anyway, I knew I'd never use all of it. However, I do plan on using music from Jake Hill and Weatherday though, as I believe because they are very small and easily contactable, I could get licensing pretty cheap or even for free, especially if I discuss with them the topic of the film. The article said it was a smart idea to do that, as if the concept is appealing to them, they may offer a good deal. Both of these artists specifically operate online, interacting with fans constantly, and have very small followings, so contact will be easily achievable I'm hoping.

soundtrack

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weatherday

2,708 followers

easily contactable

 

SONGS

My Sputnik Sweetheart

Agatka!
 

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Bandcamp has a special contact feature, which will forward your message directly to the artist. They advise that you give about 5-7 days before a response, so I'm just waiting now.

Through doing this I discovered she had merch, I might order some for the character of Charlie, but it's mainly an excuse to get some for myself (teehee)

 
I also reached out to her over a Twitter and Instagram with the same message, which is where I got a response in just a few days!

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We discussed prices for a little while and she was very generous! We haven't talked since because there's been no reason to, but I'm hoping she will still be willing to let me use her music after all this time, as she seemed very open to it at the time.

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My plan however, is to edit a version with whatever music I want to make as the final project. But, everyone I've shown this script to has said I should submit the film into short film festivals. So that I can avoid legal trouble, or even be able to enter my film into festivals, after the school project is done I'm going to edit a version with music I have licensed rights to, and a whole new soundtrack. I'm doing this as I probably can't compose a whole score in the fourteen weeks I have to finish this project in. I do have an idea for how I want it to sound sonically though. 
The soundtrack is going to be made up of soft, distant guitar and piano melodies, tuned the same as the guitars heard in Ivy by Frank Ocean, and also like the guitar work and piano work in tracks Waste and Summer by Bearface. 
My main inspiration for this, aside from the tracks themselves, is the Breath Of The Wild OST. The soundtrack for this game is mostly made up of distant, sweet piano melodies. This, rather than a bombastic soundtrack made up of hundreds of sounds, makes for a very personal feeling adventure. I'd like to replicate this in my film. I also feel like, as with the pairing of Ivy by Frank Ocean to the opening scene, the sounds of these guitars would fit really well sonically and aesthetically. I'm hoping to work with Jack Henry Greene for this. He composes and performs all the music for his projects, and is well musically talented. He even did a few mock ups for the theme tune for my scrapped project The Jig Is Up

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visual style

I decided I want to use a 4:3 aspect ratio for my film. I feel like the square format is stylistic and distinct, and the closed in feeling an almost square aspect ratio gives off many effects. The square makes it feel so much more personal and focussed on our main character Charlie. It's her story, with every scene having her in, so why not re enforce that through the presentation, all the way down to the technical aspects? I thought that doing this would also be a smart way of representing body dysphoria. Body dysphoria is something that most  trans people deal with. It is where you feel discomfort with the way your body is. Trans women feel discomfort as when they look in the mirror they do not see a "woman's body". It's this awful feeling of discomfort, you don't feel as though your body is your own. Having a 4:3 ratio for my film enforces the idea of body dysphoria, by making the viewer feel trapped within the frame when watching, much like how trans people can feel trapped within their own bodies. On top of this, I just feel like it makes for some nice visuals, that have been used in two of my favourite music videos, The New Great Depression by The Moth and The Flame, and Better Things by Josh A featuring Darko. It's also used in one of my favourite films, Mid90s, directed by Jonah Hill.

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With this film I'd also like to keep with my style I've started establishing in recent projects. I like to play with central framing a lot. It will work well for Gecko, as it is very personal and character driven, and would make things look really balanced with the given aspect ratio. Here are some examples from my last film, A Walk In The Woods.

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Here I've put together a mood board of inspiration for the style of Gecko, both thematically and visually, and what gives me inspiration. It'll be a blend of sorts of everything seen here. There's even some anime screenshots from Evangelion and FLCL, as I like the writing in those shows and the often muted / homey colour palettes which I'd like to replicate

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Media shown are Joker, Phonebooth, Mid90s, Audition, Titane, Good Time, Blue Sushi, Evangelion, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Nightcrawler, FLCL, First Love, Sorry to Bother You, Donnie Darko, as well as some screencaps of films I've worked on.

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